More Desires
by
Zerelda X
Jean belongs to Marvel. For entertainment purposes only.
'Rock and Roll Dreams Come True' written by Jim Steinman, Copywrite 1993 by Music Corp of America, Inc. and Lost Boys Music. Used without permission.
A sort of sequel to 'Desires.'
Jean turned on the radio, tuning in an 'oldies' station, bored out of her mind. Of course, oldies these days meant anything recorded more than five years ago.
Maybe a long hot bath would feel good. At least it would waste some time if she had a good book. She should've checked with Rogue and borrowed a good bodice ripper.
What she needed was to lose control for a few hours. Lose control and do something daring, something completely out of character. Something for herself.
What would it be?
~*~*~*~*~
....you can't run away forever, but there's nothing wrong with getting a good head start....you want to shut out the night, you want to shut down the sun, you want to shut out the pieces of a broken heart....
~*~*~*~*~
She didn't have an outlet like the others did. She had to be strong and perfect at all times. Ororo had her garden, Betsy her swordplay and meditations, Charlotte her knives and wrestling, Rogue had flying and shopping. What did she have, really have, that was her own? Nothing.
~*~*~*~*~
....once upon a time was a backbeat, once upon a time all the chords came to life....and the angels had guitars even before they had wings, if you hold on to a chorus you can get through the night....
~*~*~*~*~
Idly her body began to move to the music, the beat seducing her. She responded to it, letting it flow through her body. It felt good.
~*~*~*~*~
....remember everything that I told you, and I'm telling you again that it's true....when you're alone and afraid, and you're completely amazed to find there's nothing anybody can do....
....keep on believing and you'll discover, baby....
~*~*~*~*~
She started to strip off her clothing, turning the simple act of disrobing into a sensual delight that even felt daring. Her eyes closed. All that existed was the music.
~*~*~*~*~
....there's always something magic, there's always something new....and when you really really need it the most, that's when rock and roll dreams come through....the beat is yours forever, the beat is always true...and when you really really need it the most, that's when rock and roll dreams come true....for you....
~*~*~*~*~
She'd dreamed of being a dancer when she was a little girl, like most little girls did, but her dreams died with the emergence of her powers. Other dreams replaced them, she wasn't sure now if the new dreams were hers or someone else's. Not that it mattered anymore.
~*~*~*~*~
....I treasure your love, I never want to lose it....you've been through the fires of Hell, and I know you got the ashes to prove it....I treasure your love, I want to show you how to use it....you've been through a lot of pain in the dirt, and I know you got the scars to prove it....
~*~*~*~*~
Now she wasn't sure if her dreams hadn't been replaced by nightmares. It felt like it when she scared herself awake some nights. Thank God for Scott. She didn't have to tell him what terrified her, he already knew. Sometimes he was scared with her. God, she loved him.
The music slid its way up her spine, she stretched and moved with it, disconnecting her thinking mind, just feeling. When was the last time she'd done something this innocent? Just let go? Stopped being *Betty fucking Barbie Crocker?* Stopped being Den Mother Superior? Stopped trying to be perfect, to be worthy of the Dream? Who's fucking dream was it, anyway?!
Imagine being allowed to let the wildness out, like Charlotte did in the Danger Room with Logan, or Betsy did with Warren when they flew together. They thought their activities were their secrets, but she knew. And she was jealous. Jealous of Ororo losing herself in the storms. Just plain jealous. They didn't have an image to live up to, not that any of them would if they had. Why did she?
~*~*~*~*~
....remember everything that I told you, and I'm telling you again that its true....you're never alone cause you can put on the 'phones and let the drummer tell your heart what to do....
....keep on believing, and you'll discover, baby....
~*~*~*~*~
Scott heard music when he opened the door to the boat house, but he didn't think much about it. He'd come for the papers he'd left here this morning, belatedly remembering he was to give them to Professor Xavier.
After checking around, he finally decided he left them in his night stand. Opening the bedroom door he found his wife in the midst of sliding the last of her underclothing off her hips, her movements timed to the music. Her eyes were closed, her head back, a silky curtain of red hair flowing around her.
Jean opened her eyes to see her husband in the classic 'slack-jawed yokel' pose standing at the door.
They stood staring at each other for a long moment, then she reached out to him.
~*~*~*~*~
....there's always something magic, there's always something new....and when you really really need it the most, that's when rock and roll dreams come through....the beat is yours forever, the beat is always true....and when you really really need it the most, that's when rock and roll dreams through....for you....
~*~*~*~*~
She licked her lips. "How would you like to play hooky today?"
He swallowed hard, and shut the door behind him.
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